Jual Lombu (Ep.1)

Classification :: Personal story

I'm gonna do it with my two cousins, Afiq and Aliazak, and a neighbour's son, also named Afiq. So we have big Afiq and small Afiq.

Yeah, I've been busy since the October 20th. I was asked to do this and that, and even to carry my sister's new bed on my Frontier from Kulai to JB. Then I've gotta be sending my brother in Russia's parcel by DHL (walla the charges was like sky high).

The next saturday morning, I was forced to get up early as some people offered to give me a big chopping board. Then, I went to the farm to get to know what was going on. Later at night, another cousin arrived and we surveyed for the area to do the business the next day. We decided, it's gonna be the EXTRA supermarket near Kg. Melayu.

As we woke up really early in the next morning, I sent my cousins to the place and I rushed off to Pekan Nanas to get the cattle carcass. Then, I rushed off back to the place that we planned to sell the meat.

I arrived there at around 7.30 where there are actualy already customers waiting. They're all lucky as the carcass were still warm.

Well, this post is actually intended to publish a few funny/fishy incidents during the day I sold the meat to the public. The dialogue is gonna be in Malay!

Incident 1.

Indon : Saya mahu daging sekilo, urat setengah kilo.
Me : Err urat? (whispering to Ali azak) Urat yang mana satu?
Aliazak : Ni yang den lomah ni....

We end up giving the guy things that I my self do not have any idea what was that.

Incident 2.

Akak Cun : Akak nak jantung boleh?
Me : Eh boleh boleh, hati saya pun boleh hehehe :p. Afiq bagi jantung!
Akak Cun : (smiling)
Afiq Besar : Ok kak, semuanya RM10.
Akak Cun : Terima kasih.

Later, when I was cleaning the internal organs, I found the cow's heart. We have only one cow so how come we had two hearts?

Me : Oi! Ni ada jantung ni. Apa yang kau jual kat akak tu?
Afiq Besar : Entah. Dia pun main amik je.

Incident 3.

Makcik : Daging batang pinang berapa?
Me : RM25 sekilo makcik
Makcik : Makcik nak semua.
Me : Yay! Aliazak. Mana daging batang pinang yang dah diasingkan?
Aliazak : (Sambil bukak tudung besen) Alamak dah hilang.. mano poie eh tah...
Me : ???????????????

Incident 4.

One uncle had come earlier and had talks and jokes with me. Later he asked;

Pakcik Tua : Berapa harga daging ni?
Me : RM17 sekilo pakcik. Pakcik nak berapa kilo?
Pakcik Tua : Err daging lembut ada?
Me : Daging lembut? Eh, gigi pakcik kan penuh lagi? Takkan nak daging lembut kot?
Pakcik Tua : Eh Power lagi ni. Keras lagi ni. Hahaha..
Me : Batang pinang takde. Err.. batang lain ada la..
Pakcik Tua : Batang apa?
Me : Batang pelir. hahahahaha!

Lucky me, he bought the batang pelir.. everything at RM10 only plus 5kg of meat.

Incident 5.

There was one very poor looking old man riding a bicycle approaches me and asked me the price.

Me : RM17 pakcik.
Poor looking old man : Mahal tu.
Me : Pakcik, ini memang harga pasar.
Poor looking old man : Takpela. Nanti pakcik datang lagi.
Me : Pakcik, takpe-takpe.. pakcik cakap aje berapa harga pakcik boleh bayar saya terima aje. (pity him ya know)
Poor looking old man : Takpe, pakcik nak jahit seluar dulu nanti pakcik datang balik.

Later, poor looking old man came back and wanted the softest part from the thigh. He wanted the meat to be sliced nicely as he wanted to make stew out of it. Then,

Poor looking old man : RM17 kan?
Me : Haah.
Poor looking old man : (took out his money from his pocket. I was shocked as he has bulks of RM100 notes tighten with a few rubber bands.)
Me : (cheh kaya rupanya orang tua ni. nasib baik aku tak sebut discount lagi)

* Of course it's gonna be the Ep.2 of Jual Lombu!