December 31, 2004

World Issue :: Tsunami...

It was panicking, shocking and sorrowful.

It begins with the worst earthquake in the sea for the past 40 years with 9.0 on Richter Scale reading. Depends on the location and place, the earthquake has possibly produced waves that travels along the sea, gaining momentum over the distance and hitting most of the lands or copast facing the the Hindi Ocean.

The quake was sensed at almost the whole peninsular of Malaysia. My brother, who was in seremban, felt dizzy as the world was like shaken for a few minutes. The Window panes in Sogo was cracked. In Kelantan, people get off their building as the shakening was too obvious.

Acheh, the nearest place to the earthquake. was getting the largest impact of the earthquake. Land connecting routes and road were totally destroyed. All sort of communication were a total disablement.

For 5 minutes of quake, it's not an end. A big wave was later come to take lives of living people....

The sea that carries the waves resulting from the eartquake was like being lifted upside down. Seawaves coming out of nowhere, swallowing every single thing foudn at the beach/coastal area. Worse, it colonized the land and took as many victims as possible......




Leaving nothing behind. Thousand of solns were taken. Up to today's paper, almost 18k of people were found dead. In Sri Lanka, the waves reaches almost 10 km towards the land. The wave even reached Penang and Langkawi. Opps, and I haven't mentioned about India, Somalia, Phuket.

The latest quake happened in Andaman Islands.


As I myself hardly recalling, I remembered not a tale story but true, within the era of Prophets of Allah were still exist on the earth.

It's about people who were not so thankful to God for thing He granted to people living on the earth. The prophet has alarmed his people thanking the God for whatever things He granted but people take it too for granted.

God promised good things for good deeds and of course instead. So, the people there were given with more food, more income so that people would be thankful. Anyway, people were getting too rich for such thing and they've forgotten that everything does copme from the God.

(concentrate from this point)

Fishermen were getting more and more fish from the sea. Then there were time where fishes even come to the land and people would easily take and get them. But, as they were having fun catching all the fish surrenderring to them, something happened and all died (as it was not clearly mentioned what was happening but, it can be summarised as all the people die)

(Get the point and relate it with what I'm trying to say)


The people around the world should be more educated on knowing the signs of quakes or such wave.

  • A few days before, fishermen were getting more fish than usual.
  • All the animals in the Sri Lankan Zoo were found missing from their places, just before the waves hit 'em.
  • The waves had pushed the fish towards the beaches and people were catching 'em (just like in the story) before they were taken with the wave in to the sea.


    People were talking about God's punishment to human

    I would understand this. Relate it to the story. But why Acheh?


    Call for volunteers

    The world is calling for volunteers. The govt. servant of Malaysia will be given off record leave for being the volunteers.


    Stop all the New Year Celebrations

    And the people asked for the money to be reverted, to be used to help the victim of Tsunamis.


    The increment of the found dead bodies...

    As the helping hands are now trying to reach the West Coast of Sumatera which is not yet being reached by any Emergency Troops.


    In the world's havoc of the tsunami, Ye-Yann cremation was peacefully completed on Tuesday. Rosli was there, as a respect to a best friend, colleague and everything. I wasn't able to reach KL on time as I was busy handling new things in JB.

    I reached KL on Wednesday, took Rosli to Mid Valley and we started to talk heart to heart abt what were we losing and missing. It's all about YeYann, and how the jealous-ful wife of him has now understand why he'd become so close to YeYann. I cried. He cried too.

    As we completed packing Yann's thing in the office, to Taman Desa we headed and met her sister, YeShin. She was so thankful to us, the best friend, colleague and supporters of YeYann while she was still alive. I sent him back to the office and went to see Ieda in Jalan Duta to discuss on a few things with her Mom, and on my way back to Seremban, I dropped by Beranang and had my long chat with Rosie as I won't be able to attend his Bro's wedding this Sunday.

    For sure, I'll miss talking to her, and I am now.

    So back in JB, doing nothing, I'm preparing to help my Father for his Family Day.

    In JB now, I miss people in KL a lot....!
  • December 30, 2004

    .: Visit to Tanjung Pinang (Last Episode) :.


    On the third day, everyone was pretty cautious for the things that happened yesterday. Tsunami had attacked most of the coast facing the Hindi Ocean. Some friends called me asking whether I'm safe or instead as they really have no idea where exactly I was.

    Nothing much for today except for the visit to RRI, which stands for Radio Republik Indonesia or Radio of Republic Indonesia. Well, Indonesians pronounced RRI not as "arr-arr-i", instead, it is pronounced "err-err-ee". I wonder why but it's true..

    As in the picture, they were standing in front of the building of RRI for Tanjung Pinang. They even have the special Malay Edition of their radio, which meant for Melayu-Riau, listener, which they aired their programmes in Malay language (not indonesian). The channel can be captured quite clearly in Mersing, but not in the other parts of Johor or Malaysia.

    Then we were taken to a Tea packing factory. I don;t really care as the people there were so unfriendly.. so what..

    Then we went for shopping in the area aroung the hotel we stayed. I planned to buy a few things for friends back in Malaysia. Well, my mood was totally switched as I've got the call from Malaysia about the death of my friend. Then I bought nothing at all, except for a few pieces of Batik cloth.

    I was half crying as I accompanied Izzat, Nain and Adzni shopping their things. As we have lunch, Yann's image was like appearing by my side. I started to miss her so so much by then.

    Then we went off for Malaysia. Would you remember the face above? It's Ali Mamak (Jantan bin Osman) which was populared by the Santan Berlada comedy sitcom, years ago..

    We reached Stulang Laut at about 5.30 pm and get back home.

    It was a wonderful visit, but you know..

    - Visit to Tanjung Pinang 2 -


    So today is my first breakfast ever in Tanjung Pinang. They prepared fried rice, fried noodles and half boiled eggs.

    I was about to wear shorts but as I was told that we're going to visit a mosque, I just wear my jeans.

    So today we're actually going to Penyengat Island. It was actually called as Pulau Penyengat Indera Sakti. It used to be the center of the Riau Monarchy Empire.

    At last, a picture of me being snapped. From left :: Unkle Fikri, his youngest son, his daughter, Me, Farah and Adzni, his eldest son.

    We were on the boat to pulau penyengat. The most left is my mom. The rest is Unkle Fikri's Family members. The back there I don't know.

    As we arrived on the island, we were first brought to the mosque. It was so special as some of the structure of the mosque was strengthen using the eggs.

    This is the mosque.

    Then we're brought to graveyards of the well known people like Raja Haji, all the sultans and so on. Pictures would tell...

    In the picture was my uncle, his wife, my mom, farah and Izzat. Read the board behind 'em.

    It was me standing at the entrace of the next graveyard.

    This is a grave. Would u believe it? You must see the first one.

    Then we were brought to the old shopping complex of the island.

    An old well which was found here and still being used as I can still sniff the fragranced soap smells.

    Then, we were brought to a series of castle, graveyard, shopping complex and a fort.

    The castle. It is still being used. Renovation work in progress.


    The fort which is situated on top of a hill. There were more 40 cannons were in use. Nowadays, only 11 of them left.

    Izzat was sitting on an 8 feet cannon. Dun play play huh..!

    When we finished the tour around the island, we were asked to wait as the locals were going to treat us with lunch. When I first sat and waiting, I thought they're goinna serve us with Tapai, instead it's nasi dagang wrapped with the leaves of Banana, and it does look like tapai.

    Then we moved back to Tanjung Pinang island. I like this picture very much. It's my father. Do u like this picture?

    Went back to our room, and relaxed. We were taken to Ramayana Shopping Complex. There's a Fun Zone. You know what..? In Malaysia, we pay RM1 for a token. In Indonesia they just need to pay Rupiah1000, equivalent of less than 50sen Malaysia.

    Without wasting so much time, I played at the fun Zone and, I spent about rupiah 100,000 just to play games. I managed to get a tupperware for my mom and 2 Elephant dolls, one for Adzni's brother and anither one is for Farah.

    At nite, there was a dinner, karaoke but I went out early as I went out with Izzat, Adzni and Nain.

    Then we get sleepy as I do now..


    (to be continued)

    December 29, 2004

    - Visit to Tanjung Pinang 1 -

    I had a chance for the 1st time of my life to pay a visit to Tanjung Pinang, Indonesia. It's a visit conducted by the Welfare and Sports Club of Forestry Dept. of Johor. I'm supposed to write this journal earlier but it just that, you know it.

    Tanjung Pinang is located somewhere south of Singapore, so for all other folks, I was safe and sound from the earthquake impact and the tsunami effect. Thank God.

    It was the last Saturday, I woke up early and get myself ready for the visit. Reached Stulang at around 9.30 am and there was a sea of indonesian illegal immigrants waiting for their turn to take off back to Indonesia, either by ferry or by boat.

    The immigration people there treat us quite well. It's quite easy for to walk in and out of the immigration. Once we're in we picked our seats and wait.

    Suddenly, the ferry become full with more people coming in. I can see frightened faces of the visit group of people. They seems to be uneasy and uncomfortable. The taking off delayed till one hour. Anyway, we took off at 11, a delay of an hour. In fact, I tried talking to a few indonesians and they seems to be friendly.


    Reached the port of Tanjung Pinang at around 2 o'clock. The captain has asked the indonesians to wait for their turn as to let people from Malaysia to get off the boat first. As the ferry reached the port, they disobeyed the captain's order and I myself is getting worried to be having to rush in squeeze myself with those people. Luckily, the attendant at the door asked the Malaysian to come out first. Kewl..

    We walked to the hotel. It's Hotel Tanjung Pinang. It's just 5 mins walk from the port. We had quite a nice Lunch, and I get to know this one girl named Diana. She seems to be nice but not so pretty. She offered me her cell no. Hihi..

    Visit Time :: We took bus to this one place known as the Village of the Fisherman, at Batu 10, Tanjung Pinang. We started with going to a place of handcrafts using sand. Then we move to a place selling Kerepek and later on we moved to the said Village. And we're supposed to be playing Volleyball!!!

    @ Nite :: Own activity. Me and My Family went to dinner at a very special place. They even have special menu too!!

    I was enjoying the food. Voluptiously tasteful!

    Have u ever ate this? Ask for this when u went to Tg Pinang!!!

    After dinner, went back home and zzzZZZZZZZZZZ....

    (to be continued)

    .: In Memory of Chang Ye Yann :.

    Location :: Tanjung Pinang, Indonesia
    Date :: 27/11/2004
    Time :: Around 12:40 pm

    I was walking within the bazaar of Tanjung Pinang when I received a call..

    Caller :: Hei bai, where are u, what are u doin?
    Me :: Hmm, I'm still in Indonesia. Goin back today..
    Caller :: There's a bad news. Ye Yann passed away.
    Me :: What???????????????????????????????????

    I thought she was only kidding when she was always mentioning about terminating her own life. Yeah, she had problems, and I keep telling her that everyone got their fuckin' own problem and she's not so special for not be having one.

    The last time I saw her was last Wednesday, when I pay a visit to both her and rosli in Muamalat, just before I left for JB. She seems to be happy, and keep saying that she missed the existence of me in the office, the one she is so used to.

    The last thing I knew about her was, I'd really hope that she really went to church to join in the christmas recital when I was teasing her by saying you're a buddhist..

    And now, why do i have to waste my tears for someone who doesn't want to listen to me, even though i was fuckin care and treasure all the things about her??

    Yann, you know what....

    I feel bad, you were having so much problems and then I left. I feel too bad for that. I love you just like if I have my own sister which I've longed for.

    I will always be the 1st to arrive in the office, then rosli and you'll be the last to complete our members to have breakfast. Then we may go lunch together, or even sometimes when we're bored, we go out and chit chat, or even had walk in KLCC.

    Yann, I miss u so much. Who do u have to? I even dreamt of you last nite, when I was getting so hard to get my eyes closed tight, I really dreamt seeing you and asked you WHY? You were half-smiling and you went away..

    Yann, I miss u so much, and I'll be missing you so so much a lot. I miss the time we went to KLCC and look for your dresses. I'll miss the time when we go to Mid Valley and you will always tease Rosli to be introduced to all your friends. I miss to ride in your car and browsing thru all your cd collections.

    I'll miss going shopping with you. I'll miss going to the wantan mee shop with you. Goin to bangi. I'll miss your laughs when I was looking at girls in Cyberjaya.

    Then, I knew that I won't be able to talk to a lot as I leave EDS, but I don't know that it's forever.

    Yann, I know you'll read this. Listen to me. I want you to know that I will always be missing you. No matter what, we're always a good friend. Come in my dream and I can always listen to you as we always do..

    December 23, 2004

    Ain't it pain......

    This is not easy for me. I was always been thinking that getting into a new place would be always alright and full of fun. Well, back then, I knew that I'd be leaving all the best thing i have in KL.

    When it come to friends, I will always had Hemsem in my mind. Then my best buddy Romdzi and Wira is next. When I need an ear, Farok will always lend me his ears. And there were Taiko and Lego to share laugh and pain.. And Eric happened to be my best accompany.

    Hemsem, the kewlest person i've ever met. I just realized that he was always there, by my side whatever, whenever bad things happened to me. He took a very good care of me when i was hospitalized back then. He and some other friends stayed back in the hospital. We slept altogether in the hospital. I was like a child, asking for this and that, Hemsem, Wira and Romdzi is always there for me. His ears were just like mine, I can have it whenever I need it.

    I remembered there was once both of us, for nothing was sitting on a rotting wood at the Klebang Beach, talking and most of the time in silence, replacing the cigarettes after another. I was the one who asked him to accompany me that night. He just went with me even though I know he had a lot of other things to do.

    I'd been working with him in Amstek for about a year. He had been so patience for all the circumstances we've been facing, i backed off as I've other important things to go for. As usual, he will always light his cigarette and just be kewl, anything happens.

    Wira is always a gadget and network person. Everytime I'm in USJ, he'll do things with his laptop. He is very helpful. SO I would say, I would do anything for him, just say it. When he's gonna get married, I'm so happy for him but I know he won't be available as much as we normally have before this. And I would say, he was there too when I face the worst incident in my life, he was there, saw it and till now he understands what's going on with me. Not everyone can understand my very self.

    One special thing about Romdzi is that he shared birthday with me. Exactly the same day, same year. A straight forward person, very kind and he was there too, witnessing and sharing every hardship I'd ever been too. I would not forgive myself if anything bad ever happened to him. I wish, his wife will get pregnant soon. That is all his wish as I can understand. As we've been to karaoke, even though he's happy, I can feel it that he's hoping for this one thing. I know.. I know..

    Taiko and Lego was my housemate back then. We share laughs, hardships and even we used to shared a pack of Maggi mee. It ain't easy when life were so hard upon us. Taiko cried seeing me laying in the hospital, I was so touched how did my friend so in love and care about me. There was once, Eric was with me all the time and he was there crying there like a child, regretting the cause of my accident. Where else in the world I'm gonna get friends like this? Lego always helped me in my exams, studies. I'm not the studying type so I just need a friend to feed me with all this. Lego is the person.

    When I first entered the English course in Seremban, I only knoe this one guy named Farok. Started with nice conversation, and later knowing that he's smoking too, and we became buddies. We stayed nearby, even being a roommate. Like a couple, sometimes we do fight and quarrelling, but we know we just care for each other. He is nothing but a kind and brilliant person, well, who loves to play sojourn.

    Those are only true friends I have. Even though, of course I do know a lot of people, I dare to ask anything just from these people. Not to anyone else. I know they won't let me down.

    But being for a year with a very nice boss, Rosli, has been the best working moment in my life. Some people would say good friends cannot work together. It seems to be quite wrong for me as I developed friendship and fellowship with Rosli through things we do in the office and outside of the office.

    Ye-Yann who is now in the depression mode, seems to be so happy and excited, playing with my little hairs on my head as seeing me coming over the office. I don't know about my boss. He seems to be okay. All he was talking about is to make a move from the current thing he is doing to another thing in Singapore or Indonesia. But I just don't understand, I just can't help it... I was off the place with sadness, which I myself would not understand.

    These people are just like family to me. As I always do, any bad thing happened, I will always get back to my family. U know I'm always need to be pampered person. So in KL, I will always get back to these friends of mine, They are just like my family. Even all my family members know them very well.

    Off KL, with all the sweat and tears I have, I pray and wish our fellowship remain strong.

    I will miss u people a lot.

    December 22, 2004

    Jalan-jalan, cari makan...

    Yeah.. last nite.. I was dragged to a chat with a girl named maisarah, out of nowhere. She rocks!

    Then I went to Uptown, with hemsem, rosli and rota. We were looking for this one outlet, lot 1051, then we found..

    .: Nana's Kitchen :.

    Location :: Lot 1051, Uptown Damansara, KL

    Items :: Porridge with variants of ingredients. Fish porridge, chicken porridge, beef porridge (haha.. i was about to type meat porridge).

    Specialty :: Fish porridge, and later on, she's gonna serve Seafood Porridge. Last but not least, the most special thing about it is the pretty Marina :p.

    In Future :: She's gonna have chicken wings.. and a lot more.

    Recommendation :: Come come come.. cheap cheap cheap.. hahaha.. Go for fish porridge..

    Rating :: 3.5 stars and will be increased.


    You know what? I think she purposely put more pepper inside my porridge to sabotage me.. haha.. And it was too hot i burnt my tongue.. hahaha... purposely huh..

    She would be serving more items. It's a complimentable attempt to do biz. I salute her for that. I wish she'll be doing fine with all the things she's doing now. I know she can make it. She's willing to learn for anything that would help her..

    She rocks! All the best...

    December 21, 2004



    I feel so lazy nowadays. Not in the mood even to write my blog.

    Maybe, I've talked so much.. Yesterday I was talking to Ija, today in the morning i talked to Fiza, in the afternoon i talked to a stranger, happened to be Hemsem's friend or maybe someone he's trying to lob for a project in the TNB IT.

    I was then blamed for going out late from the Menara Telekom's 3rd floor cafetaria for showing off what i've done within the execution of the building's Intelligent system. I don't know, I just talked too much...!!!!!

    .: Today :.

    Yeah man... I'm kewl there.. after almost a year i've been keeping this to myself, I must see Fiza no matter what, and it happens today. Such a big event to me huh? Hmm.. I guess it's a 'yes'. As I've finished doing my work earlier in the morning, i didn't realize that it's already 8.30 in the morning. I get online and saw Fiza get online'd' as well. Guess she must be already in the office.

    She warned me to better be quick as she might be called up at anytime since almost of her dept. colleague were away on leave. As I was rushing there, in fact, I drive real slow, no need to rush.. I was thinking how 'cold' or 'keras' she would be.

    Well, she was not. She talked easily as we've been meeting each other for so many times already. Gewd. We were talking about so many things. God I love talking to her. Really. The I was sitting there with her from 9.45 to 12.45. She asked to leave then, my heart is not gonna let her go but I've to.

    I'm gonna miss talking to her. I'm gonna miss her too...

    .: Karaoke??? :.

    Then I called Romdzi to get off his ass from his office to come and see me downstairs. As I can remember, during my working time with Telekom R&D, waiting in front of the Menara Telekom's Lobby was alright but today I was asked to leave after 5 minutes. Waiting for this good friend of mine was quite sometime so I decided to go drive around the tower till he reached the lobby. Well, hemsem asked us to get ourselves to the 3rd floor.

    Here, I talked a lot again.. I'm not actually trying to be kewl, or clever, or what ever. I'm just trying to be nice to people. You know, if I'm about to ignore people, I'll just ignorantly not talking to them and made faces. But I do think that guy is a nice guy so I was there talking till everyone gets bored. Pity them.. haha.. a ruined me..

    I remember Sazuan told me, she can't remember me being talkative during school.

    Well, I think this all happens after the accident. Guess, I've got the blood donated by a talkative person. Worse, I tend to be too active and to excited at times. This is just a bunch of shit I had in my mind.. shit shit shit....

    S we were then went out to KTV bangsar and went in for the Rm8 per head package. I took lunch, and sang. I do think I sang badly nowadays. Ya know, I've not been seen in the KTV for quite sometimes so what do u EXPECT???


    Now I'm home. Gotta plan for he thing next.. 2nite, Uptown, gonna visit Marina's newly opened stall. Gonna try how slurpy she cook there.

    Just, I pitied her for being fooled by a friend of mine....

    A week.....

    That was my worst futsal day...

    Only 6 of us, me, rosli, mie, botak, faiz and hemsem.. too bad.. i was tired like mad... i was about to throw out.. about to faint... my head was not getting enough supply of oxygen.. i was too weak to carry on with the game....

    The next day... I'm not expecting the farewell dinner to be today... but they have it today. No details.. It just that I invited Ieda to come along.. and there was something terrible happened, but guess it's now settled.

    Then it's Naresh, Rosli, Ieda and of course me...

    Shankar, Jeff, Ash, Chia, Ye-Yann, Rama and Sagar..

    Thursday.. Afterwork, I went out with Ailin.. yeah.. we've lost contact but all this this while she was sick and without telling me, she was hospitalized and not able to get to me.. ridiculous.. but nvm.. i'm fine with it..

    Friday morning, I was busy preparing myself to leave the company.. made backup of everything.. then I went off to bangi. Took rosli and Yann to the 'LOT 10' in bangi and had ikan bakar.. as usual.. haha.. and not going to the Jumaat Prayer.. I and rosli went to the Mines. We both enjoyed looking at the chix.. a very much better sightseeing than in the planet hollywood.

    After that, I went to cyberjaya for the exit interview. it was fun.. but i felt bad for leaving the company.. then me and rosli went to PJ. went to Temenos office. then we went A&W PJ, met yann over there and sit there and talk.

    That nite.. I was supposed to go to Farok's house.. but I fall asleep. Only woke up the next day after Lego called me. Planned to meet at Taman Melawati as we're going to Wira's Wedding.

    Coincidentally, Wira was wearing a red Baju Melayu. I was wearing a red shirt and Lego's whole family was dressed in red too. What a conincidence. People hardly recognise me as the result of my botak-head.

    There I met Gee, Arif Atan, Mizwan, Mohaini, Sally, Rosli, Lim Jan Nee, Hemsem, Bigan, Farok, Lego, Giant, Engku, Bisu, Noral, who else uh.. it was quite a gathering.

    Then I drove back to kampung. It was hakim circumsizing. He was circumsized the day before and there are so many people in the kampung. I talked a lot with Surato. There are so many sweet things during the childhood.

    Sunday nothing happened. I was just playing the PS2 izzat just bought for himself. Then we went back to Seremban.. watched rides, pimp my ride and I selpt early.

    Monday, I went to KL, to take my father to his seminar and I'm gonna fix his car's faulty. Sent him to Kepong. I drove to USJ and wait. Fiza called me up. Hmm I was driving and a white dressed cop was riding his big bike next to my car. Luckily Fiza was okay with that (i lurve this girl for being so understanding)without knowing that later when I call she's gonna tell me that she was merajuk...? Well.. hafta be there for the whole day!!!

    I was only able to drive back to Senawang at around 6 pm and arrived in senawang around 7++pm . Caused by the congested highway. Well, no more checklights on.

    @ nite, I went to fetch Ija and we went to my favorite Yong Tau Foo shop. Then sent her back, went to USJ and started this write up. Then was watching the Us version of the first french version of the Taxi. Damn it.. I thought it's gonna be fun but it's a total copy!

    I'll update with pictures soon...

    December 14, 2004

    Today is my futsal day..

    I went back late for nothing. Was browsing through the internet and try to read all the emails kept in my email account. Most of them were, PORNS!

    Goin out with Harliyan was not as fine as I would expect. Well, I had a very nice dinner, 2 plates of rice with grilled stingray & squids, portuguese style, it has been the all-time-favorite of me and my friends. She wasn't in the mood as I was as usual made a lot of fun about her. Ya know, make fun of people is a lot of fun, to me at least.

    Guess, I was overdoing it. After receiving this one call, she seems to be moody and start to fly kite. She was mad at me, and as you people know me, I always avoid this kind of troubles by staying away. I've nothing to do with her problem anyway. I sent her back and got to bed early, as early as b4 12 midnite. Julie, salmi and ija texted me about so many things that I can just take a look at it in the morning.


    I'm early today. Rosli found my shiny head amongst so many people surprisingly and asking for a brekfast together. As I was sitting and talking..

    I saw this one figure, she seems to be familiar to me. It's Fiza, but..

    I was too shy. So bad, i don't even dare to look at her. I was about to say hi. But.. em... i'm a pathetic guy. feel like wrapping my face with the newspapers. I'm just too shy then, and later an sms from her saying, " I think i saw u. is that u? Kat mamak tadi?"

    Hehe.. i was about to reply but she called. I just say yes..... and...

    ..Chat whole day..

    Then I'm office.. (just like when people say I'm home, is this correct?) I straight away called Fiza about the things happened. She called me again after that.

    Nothing much to say. I'm glad seeing her for the first time after a very long time.

    In the office, nothing to do rather than just chatting. Saieenan as usual talking about all the f*ctable girls she met on the net. I changed thoughts with Ija. Yan would never done with her apology for the last nite. Fiza and I were talking about so many things.

    I asked a few people to come to our futsal game tonite. And Nicolai, the french guy from Murex were asking me about Anne, the new chix that has just reporting to Murex. All I can say about anne, she's not pretty, but just marvellous. I bet she would be hot on bed. I do think she's kinda kinky too.

    Lunch with Rosli and Naresh. We were talking about the problem with BCB. BCB s*cks big time! Not even the bank is a total moron, the system is idiotic and the people running the bank are pathetically retarded, mentally, and obviously the guy heading the IT department is physically retarded, as well as his half eaten brain and smelly mouth.

    Well.. that's how they speak over the table. I was just listening..

    And now I've heard Anne's voice over Nicolai's handset, while he's smiling at me like a cursed bastard. I just don't get him. Anne doesn't like him at all but all this while he was telling me all his fantasy with Anne, and don't ask about how was describing how his spurts after he spanked his thing, visualizing Anne.

    Sometimes, I'm just sick over this. And I do think everyone is not happy with me.. At this point of time.

    I'm f*ckin stressed out.. urgh!!!! (exercise 3x)

    So.. afterwards, I'm gonna meet Ieda @ the Coffee Bean Jalan Telawi Bangsar. Then gotta rush for my futsal session in Sports Planet Subang. Come come come.. cheap cheap..

    Blegh... :p

    December 13, 2004

    Life would never wait for a shiny head!

    "Life goes on..."

    A powerful phrase that i will always remember in my life. A phrase that has torn my heart into pieces. It has never made me feel better but worse.

    This 1-2 weeks seems to be quite dull for me and my colleagues in the office. Why not, Yann has been dumped by her boyfriend and she kept saying that she's so sad after a year+ of relationship, living like husband and wife and being dumped like a stupid idiotic moron.

    She cut her wrist and was sent to the hospital. Her head knocked the sharp end of the wall and her soft jelly-like brain were said to come out from her head. I was called late at midnite since my no was her last number she called before the accident. She was hospitalized for a week..

    Well.. haha.. i made up the exaggeration part :p

    Because of Yann alone, it was like no cheers for all of us. Well, her desperation to recover herself from her sadness seems to be quite a burden to me since she kept asking me out for drink and talking about her problem. I keep telling her that she'll be fine one day, and she asked me how do I faced the same thing sometime ago.

    I told her, I was crying like a baby everyday, but how sad it was, it's has already happened. Her problem is she's not that close to her family and she was alone all the way. I was lucky I've got a mom who would cry for me for whatever hardship and sadness I'm in. Not like my father. He always condemning me for my emotion, despite of his own irrationality when he's mad.

    For the last week, I've been doing a lotsa things. I went out a lot. Been meeting new chicks. Why at this time when I'm leaving the city? Why, why and why? I went out almost everyday, the result of boredom in me.

    I went to hard rock last Friday nite. It was supposed to be more people to come. I was hoping that Shalina would join us, and some other gal like azizah, rika and yann and her friends. As I'm leaving the city, would love to see 'em b4 i go.

    And b4 that, I went to Ieda's open house in Jalan Duta. I was embarassed by the way she welcomed me into her house. You know what, I came alone.. I didn't call her for direction and all of a sudden, I appeared at her house's door and she was screaming when she saw me, especially with my shiny head on! And she looks gorgeous, she's thin and pretty, even though with her braces on.

    Normally, we would hug and cheek-kiss to each other but this is her house ok? I was trying to avoid such things as her parents and all her friends are there, and the best thing, I know none else except for her. So i took up food, and done, and went off. She excorted me to my car just to say thanx and gimme the warmest hug I've ever had.. this week.

    So in the hard rock, it was the Big Band, with Nona from NRG singing. It's a bit weird for such a band like Big Band to hire Nona as the band is not playing woman's song that much. Nona has a wonderful vocal and with such a pretty face, she's a full package but she told me she has got no choice as she kissed me goodnite b4 we all went home. I didn't went home as all 8 of us went bangsar and talk cock until 5 in the morning.

    .: Saturday Morning :.

    Last nite big band did play the Sunday Morning from No Doubt. I wish they made a Saturday Morning song so I can play along too. I slept in USJ and woke up in the morning at 10 just to found out that I forgotten to took off my contact lenses and worse, I forgot to get back home!

    Last week, I've got to know a girl secretary working in cyberjaya, her name is Aza, as I opened up my eyes, she called my handphone and asking me out. I know she was joking but i just say yes.

    At around 2, I drove off home and packed my laundry cloth and had lunch. After lunch, I went home and sleep until 7. Then Aza did call, saying why didn't I call her. I dunno but I just said I'm tired of last nite, headbanging and my neck is still aching. She put off the line and, later, Suzie called me asking for a dinner together.

    I picked her up at the universiti station and went for dinner. Aza called again, but as I hate bluffers, I ignored her calls.

    .: Sunday Morning :.

    For real, so today, I wake up with someone sleeping by my side and I can sing Sunday Morning for real... I wasn't alone the nite earlier so I had someone to chat and jamming with. 11, I went off to serdang and see my father over there. Then to Lego's house, for his simple makan-makan. Her wife cook quite well. I ate a lot till i felt like throwing out. Romdzi (koter) also coming. So we talk a lot about our past time, and we played PS2 like kids, just like the past. We play and as usual we made fun of each others.

    I felt like we were in the past time, in our happy house in Bukit Beruang Melaka, where Tobiaq always breaking the pipes, Taikor was always sleeping with his hands inside his pants, Lego was always studying without his shirt on and the place where we always enjoying playing cards!!! DECLARE!!!!

    Then I headed to Cheras, went to see my cousin, as I've not seem him for the past 29 days of raya. And it's the last day of raya. At nite, I went to Yan's open house, and got the chance to see Netty and Iz as well. It's been a very long time not seeing them.

    Went back home and took a long thought about my life. Was in the bathroom, looking at my shiny head. It's becoming shinier over days.

    What's, who's, when's there for me?

    I'm blurred, even at this moment. I've no objectives being in the office now. I keep doing my job over here. There's a lot to configure, as I'm the only one who really knows how to do it.

    I'm having a hard time to actually let myself to say goodbye to my current life. A very good boss, good colleagues like Yann, Naresh. Friends like Lego, Wira, hemsem, Farok, Romdzi (koter).

    It's not as easy as kissing my Nona goodnite, or getting a goodbye kiss from Ija. It's much easier for me to run my fingers over a girl I just knew than doing this. Proven :p

    And now, my colleagues are planning a farewell party for me @ the planet hollywood.

    December 10, 2004

    *giggles* :: Lazy days......

    The rest of my life in KL...

    I woke up everyday just to notice that I'm late. Since last week, I was wasting all my sweet time in the office, and I have to do this as I still have the time to do it.

    I went out late at nite, seeing friends, or do whatever, even sitting at the bench of the bus stop and puffing Dunhil (yezza, I quit quitting smoking and Dunhil is always has been my favourite) alone, and think about what would I do next in my life.

    I'm spending my 'sisa-sisa kehidupan' (the rest of the time I have) living in KL and working with EDS. So i'd be glad to spend time with all my good friends here. To mention everyone, efdza, wira, farok, fendi, chilli, omen, romdzi, gee and whoever else..

    For the last weekend, I've invited to a lot of open houses; no less then 10 invitations but I managed to go to only few of them. And the last Sunday was so hectic. I was driving from KL, to Melaka and the to Seremban and back to KL..

    I was eventually forgotten what has been happening. I remembered on Tuesday went to futsal. What are the good things happened lately..

    Hmm.. Just to update.. I have no idea what to write.. (this edit window has been on since wednesday)

    December 9, 2004

    Movie :: The Shutter & the phenomenon behind it..

    The phenomenon

    It's all started with the study of the extra-ordinary phenomena that has been boggling the mind of so many photography enthusiasts. The unexpected images appearing in photographs since long ago has been put into study by the intellectuals; to discover the reasons and logical behind the weird phenomena.

    As this extraordinary phenomenon has always been related to the multi-cultural and mystical asian people, it was well-known that the phenomenon has been known to be happening in the so-said civilised western people as can be visualized in the pictures below.

    The above picture was taken in the latin america and look at the door behind them. This phenomenon was not only being known to people lately but it has been appearing in the snapped photographs a very long long time ago as in the below picture.

    It is well related to life isn't it? As some people were saying that babies can see these invisible living thing until they can speak. This casper like ghost was being captured in this photograph. It does look like true as the baby was staring at it as we can see in the photograph below.

    The Shutter

    It's all started with Jane, the girlfriend of a photographer named Thun, knocked down a girl in the middle of the night while driving a car but decided to leave the dead body and drive away.

    Later on, he discovered mysterious white shadows in his taken photographs. As he asks around, people were saying that it's an unrest soul that keep following him for a reason.

    Trying to hide the truth behind it as Jane did notice strange things happened, as all his friend died as results of suicide, Thun himself was badly being annoyed by the spirit.

    The Spirit :: Thun was recalling a girl, who used to be his 'bedmate', as I can interpret it, as he never reveal his affair with that girl to any of his friends. The truth is, his friends who died, raped her and caused a very bad trauma to her until she went home to her mother and died. This was unknown to anyone.

    Thun, was having shoulder ache for no reason. He went for checkups and the nurse was amazed for his unbelievable weight at 120 kg. Jane herself find Thun acts really strangely all this while. She insisted Thun to go over the girl's house but when asked, the mother said, she's in the room. Up to their curiosity, they went up and found the dead body of the girl. The belief of the unrest spirit has now fully haunting them.

    As this one fine day, Jane found a series of taken pictures, visualizing a movement of a spirit to look for something in the bookshelf. Taking it as a clue, he dug out the bookshelf and found the pictures of the girl being gangraped by Thun's friends, taken by Thun himself. Jane left Thun, and Thun became a psycho and was mental-hospitalized.

    The girl was all this while riding on his shoulder, that cause his shoulder ache for the rest of his life, and she's still riding!!!

    And I know most of u reading this from your office. The spirit maybe just behind u.


    .: Rating :.
    I Rate :: 3.5 stars

    My Comment :: I was sleeping is some parts of the movie, but I guess, it was quite frightening as I was kept awakened by the people shouting around me..

    * pictures are taken from

    December 6, 2004

    Boring :: Within these few last days..

    .: Google Search for 'Izham' :.

    I was searching through the google. Write in my name 'izham' and click.. Hundreds of results returned. When I was young, I never notice that there are many people has the same name as mine.

    I've went through this one blog Rohadi's Blog. It was about a lady married to a guy named Harriz. But she was never in love with that guy, instead she's in love with a guy named Izham.

    It was like a series of short stories. Go read it now if u don't wanna miss it. But of course it wasn't about me. Of course i've never known Nur Ain bt Hamdi. Guess that guy, Harriz is just being sincere for loving somone. I've never been to london, and being a romeo? Hmm....

    .: Decision has been made :.

    It was not an easy decision for me. I've already tendered my letter of resignation on the last Friday, after finding it to be not so comfortable to submit it on the previous day. In the morning, I've called Naresh and he informed Rosli about it. Later in the evening, he talked to me and we've jumped into conclusion that I'm final.

    Even today, Naresh asked to talk but I'm just saying that it's final. It's sad to do such a thing. I do feel that i'm so harsh to do such thing but it's for myself.

    So I'll just wait for my last day in here.. in EDS..

    December 2, 2004

    A memoir of an Uncle..

    He used to slap my face when I made faces at his back.

    Name :: His name is Mohamad bin Ibrahim. He was an english teacher in my last primary school, SK Pulau Sebang. As the disciplinary teacher, he appointed me to be one of the prefect in the school, no matter what other teachers said.

    My life & him :: I was staying at the kampung for 2 years when my father went to germany. With his Honda C70, he dedicatedly took his wife, his 2 sons and 3 of us to school. 2 rounds everyday and he never complained! In the evening, he'll wait for me from Sekolah Agama. Then, if it's not raining, 3 of us, his eldest son, me and my brother will take a ride on his bike and we go round the kampung, looking for wild roosters or shooting squirrels! It was so fun.

    Hobby :: His hobby was to go hunting. Normally for wild pigeon, deer, mousedeer, which are consumable. But sometimes, when people ask, he'll hunt the squirrels which damages people's plant, or even wild boars. And sometimes we'll go hunt the wild roosters in the jungle.

    Attitude :: And he speaks loud too! I think the whole kampng will hear him talking. Sometimes i found it irritating but I should accept the fact that he was just being himself. He was always make fun of other people, and his laugh was a medicine to me. When he laughs, all of us will smile.

    Leadership :: At the night of Raya every year, he'll be leading the crowd to takbir from house to house in the kampung.

    Lifestyle :: He used to have a lot of singing birds. They were all around the house of my granma. And he trains people football at school too. All I can say, he was an active person. Just that, he was having a lot of bad habits such as smoking and taking sweet drink and food.

    Stroke :: A shocking incident happens during the Raya Haji of 1998. He was getting a stroke and was hospitalized. He was really in a very bad shape when I came to visit him in the hospital. I was just recovered from my accident previously.

    Sadness :: Since then, no more loud laughter. No more jokes from him. He will just sit at the end of my granma's house hall and stare people from there. All his friends were gone. I was sad but my sadness was ended by other bad consequences of his illnesses.



    Last Raya :: I was so wanting to be at the kampung. I want to join in the crowd praying takbir from home to home. I don't know why. The feeling was so strong to celebrate it in the kampung this year. But I've to let my brothers to take their turn this year.

    During Raya :: I was there for just one day and went off to KL with my family. I've wanted to stay longer but my family have other plans. Was in kampung again a few days later but I can't find where my uncle is.

    Till last Sunday :: When I made a call to my father, my mom answered and told me that she was from the kampung and my uncle was in a very bad shape and no longer able to hear anything we say. I was worried but when I called my aunt she said that everything was okay.

    Last Tuesday :: My brother called and told me that he'd passed away at 4.00 pm. I can say nothing but asked him back "Are you serious???"

    Back to kampung :: I was driving as fast as possible to my kampung. Was from KL at 5.30 pm. The traffic was slow from Nilai to Seremban due to road works. After Seremban, I took the highway at 180-200 km/h just to arrive there as soon as I can do. My car cannot go faster than that otherwise I would made it much earlier.

    @Kampung :: People come and visiting. I was so tired. I can't hold myself from sleeping. Everyone else, except me, my father and all other kids seems to be not so in the mood of the funeral. I was acting as usual, as u know, as a muslim, your shouldn't be crying over someone's death.

    Morning :: Started to get busy for the funeral. I was preparing the lahad board, picking up the carrier from the graveyard, and picking up the place to cleanup/bathe the dead body from the mosque.

    Cried... :: It's the time for the last chance to see his face. Everyone came and kiss him. My tears dropped just after I kissed him on his cheeks and forehead. And followed by both my 2 brothers. I burst badly into tears, seeing my brother swiping his tears from his eyes. I was crying like a child when my aunt came and hugged me...


    * If he's still alive and kicking, there'll be a lot of laughter and joke from him .

    * He taught a lot of things about life and living. He planted a lot of fruit trees and said, "these are for y'all, not for me." I was always denying by saying, "no, u'll be there when these trees fruit."

    * I learned to ride motorbike by banging his motorbike into a wall. He was mad but he said nothing to me. Tomorrow, his bike has been back to normal and he let me to ride on it again.

    * He showed me thumbs up when I first time took my gf home (but he didn't like my brother's ex-gf)

    * During his illness, he was always cried seeing me coming back home. I told him not to cry or I'm not coming. Since then he never cries.

    * During this year's raya, I don't have any idea why he acted abnormally. Normally he'll be sad but this time, he asked to be given more and more food. I was thinking that he do not want to how off his sadness, but it's actually something else.

    May Allah bless him. I just want the whole worl to know that I love my Pak Lang so much and no one could replace him as my Pak Lang.


    November 30, 2004


    I've just got a call..

    My beloved pak lang had just passed away. I'm goin back to Melaka now..


    Oh god. Please gimme the strength. I'm losing one of of the person i loved most. I owed him a lot.

    Without him, I'm not the person I am now...


    New Look...

    Hehe.. it's a new look. I need my blog to be softer looking just like this. I love the colours.

    Sunday.. I woke up at 6 to realize that I didn't take off my lenses. Sh*t. My eyes gonna be aching the next day. I took it off, and get back to sleep and my eyes starts to aching.

    Woke up again at 10 and put on my contact lenses. I need to be on the net. It's not easy for me to get on the net nowadays. In the office, my boss was always looking on what am I doing. Was partly modifying the color scheme of my blog till Hemsem woke up and asked me to be quick. We have 2 open houses to attend.

    That means.. I need not to go to the MAD. Hahaha.. First we went to hemsem's err.. i think officemate's house in Puncak Jalil. Then we went to my friend's house, norhariati che ros. She was my classmate and coincidently her father's name is the same as my father's name too. We were good friends. Her mom knows me very well.

    It's a good chance for me to see hew new born baby. It's been 2 months, and she'd forgotten to inform me about it. So after a while in her house, we went to my house in Taman Desa. I changed took bathe, changed clothe and we went to Mid Valley.

    After a while, i sent Hemsem back home and I went out with Ija. I (only me) had dinner while she had a drink. As usual, I lost to her talkative attitude and she talk a lot more than I do.. hahaha..

    So on Monday :: I've been to work late. A lot later than usual as I woke up so so much late that day. I first have to sent my brother's things he left in my car. Met him in Masjid Jamek.

    And I went to work as usual. Do nothing. Mingling around. Loafing. Talk nonsense. That means, I'm no longer interested to work anymore. Arfan, a friend of my boss treated me, my boss and zubir to lunch. Kari kepala ikan.. Yummy...

    After work. Sent my brother back home. I told him not to smoke in my room and in the whole house as my housemate will get mad. Just before I went out, I had chit chat with her and she said, my brother can stay..

    I went out with Yan to Mid Valley. She treated me dinner at the Secret Recipe. Then we watched Leave Me Alone, starred by my favourite actor EKIN CHENG, or his real name Yee Kin Cheng, sounds a lil bit kebukitan but I love his actings.. Love it so much.

    Then we went for teh tarik at bangsar and sent her back home.

    When I'm home... I smelt something. My brother smoked in my room.

    I'm MAD!!!!!!!!!!

    Malaysian Audio Dream Final 2004!!!!!

    As a car craze human, and an audio manic, i'm presenting you the pix from the *MAD 2004!!!

    It's Mugen Foo's *ITR. Being on display from Friday to Saturday.

    It's a freak car with nice *ICE setup! Bravo!!

    A nice *ICE setup by *JVC inside a Toyota Wish

    A very loud setup. I was mad at whoever did this setup and put it on there!!!! It was so loud till everyone was dizzy all the time.

    An engine setup just like mine. Just this one is much pretty.

    An *ICE setup in a Honda Accord *CF4. Very nice and worth the money!

    *ICE = In Car Entertainment
    *MAD 2004 = Malaydian Audio Dream 2004
    *ITR = Integra Type-R
    *JVC = A electric company name lah..
    *CF4 = A model of Honda Accord. Very nice one!

    November 28, 2004

    Sesame Street Live!!!

    Hahaha.. nothing to do with the topic. I've just got the idea of the title of my blog today from the advertisement on TV just now.

    Have not been blogging since the last Thursday. I was just browsed through other people's blog, and it seems that most of the bloggers did not keep on writing except for Leez and Dolly. I love reading dolly's blog. It has always made me laugh to myself. Wira was asking why am I laughing when I read her blog. He should read it himself.

    You know, Wira is an innocent guy, unlike me. But he laughed lookin at the pix uploaded by leez on his blog (leez is a transexual so i put as his). I could not imagine if my picture is being put there. Of course people would think that the guy int the picture must have surely 'guna-pakai' leez.. yucks!!

    I've been noticing of myself, has always spent my time with my friends in USJ. The place that I used to stay from early 2000 to end of 2001 before I moved to Shah Alam. It's not really a nice place to stay. I could say, the house is not as clean and nice as my current place of stay.

    But i liked the feeling being around my friends. Trusted, nice and loving friends. My boss's aunt passed away on wednesday, so he went off early as he is heading back to taiping. He borrowed my handphone and I went off the office to Subang Jaya and had the time of myself to write the previous blog. At nite, I spent the nite with them.

    Thusrday, I went to work. It's my bro's first day of working. My boss went in late and to work is not a good idea as he's tired badly. 6.30 from Taiping and 9.30 in KL. That's fast! After work, I fetch my bro, and took him home.

    That nite, I went to Desa Hartamas, helping the HCOC preparing for the next exhibition at One Utama. Then to USJ, and on the way back sending my friends home, my car hit something and my left absorder kong'ed. Damn!!

    Friday, I didn't go to work, I went to check my car. Nothing's wrong with the arms, just the absorber. So i was calculating the cost and everything. I might not be using the same adjustable shock anymore. It's the cheapest adjustable been heard by people, but, lucky it was cheap. I don't really mind changing it back to the standard shock, but hafta find some cheap alternative for stiffness and cheap labor cost too!!!!

    After that, I went off to USJ, and spend my time there. Watching movies. Chit chat, and their streamyx is back to service. I helped Wira develop the Flash invitation card for his weeding. Wanna see? hehe.. I'm not that good though just to meet the purpose of making the Flash card. I was working without Adobe Photoshop so I have no intention to make it so graphically beautiful as all you guys did.

    That nite, my bro went off back to Seremban. I managed to watch Young & Dangerous till part 4.

    Saturday.. I went to One Utama and just wait at the booth like moron. No chicks at all. It was too hot. Luckily Jasni, another fellow of HCOC was there. I went off to One Utama and jalan-jalan inside. At 4 i took a break and went to Nur Zakri's open house and went back in at 6. Went of at 8 and went to Emma's open house, a friend of Hemsem. Then went back home and slept..

    November 24, 2004

    I've been thinking..

    Thank god.

    People were thinking about me. People wish to be having something to do with me. That's kewl hehe..

    Dear Ekin,

    I wanted to call and see you. Of course. U're so dear to me and I won't forget that. So this paragraph is special for you. Lemme know when's your open house as I'm badly wanting to go.

    And who ever else. When are you guys open house? Invite me please.. I want to be fat as I still can.. just for this Raya month!!!!

    Jules.. (Julie). A nice person from Serdang. Never been seeing her but I know she's really nice. Pity her, she's having fever. So I asked her not to drink iced water any more.

    and I've been thinking...


    I'd prefer to work on my own. I really want to do thing that's really into my interest, such as laundry, cars. I wish I can have a chain of laundries. A car service center. Then I want to provide full wedding package, from tents, catering, deejays, PA systems, stage, tables and chairs, decorations.


    I'm having this one good opportunity to supervise and manage a business, as a favor from a friend of my father, to take over his business. I might opt for this.

    Yet, another month left for me to spend with my friends in KL. I'll be planning on how to tender my resignation letter. Just another month to play futsal, another month to hang around.

    But yet for sure, I promise to try to be in KL on weekends, so I can meet those people who were always being beside me, Farok, Wira, Hemsem. I love u so much guys..

    Guess, there are new people in my list.. which I wanted to be with and spend my time.

    But for sure, after new year, I won't be around...

    How am I doing??

    So today is wednesday ..

    It's been 3 days without internet.. and 10 days without working.. it was heaven on earth.. I was watching TV like mad.. I love to watch discovery, as they aired so many things about life, and things i like most, about machineries and cars.

    Nothing new.. I'm back to KL on the last saturday. This year is quite a-no-luck year for me. No ang pow at all. Last year I maneged to collect nearly RM1k++ ang pows.

    Raya was fine. I just followed where ever my father went to. I don't want to waste my time going to other people's house who may not come over to mine. But I went to Kimi's house whose mother is now suffering from lung cancer. And I went to Wawa's house as to see her father who was sick. Then of course I went to a lot of my relative's house.

    Our family's main dishes this raya was Bolognaise Spagetti. It was populared by my bro, Izzat. He can cook really well now, just after I insulted him few months back for not having any kind of natural talent or life useful knowledge. INSULT does work well aight? At least for my lil bro Izzat. I love him for his yummy spagetti.

    I've been thinking and thinking. What's my next step.

    I'm going to be 28 next year. I had done nothing except paying a very high premium every month which caused me not to have any savings, and it was worse when i had unexpected problems like my car. I may now consider it as free of problem but the problem is I'll still have to prepare for any unexpected, u know.. just anything.

    I'm going to sell the house. I'll keep the car for myself. It's the greatest thing on earth I have now, even though I used to have greater things, but this is the best, currently.

    Do I have to quit my job? I'm sick of it. Sick of my job. Sick of the bosses. But I love my Mr. Rosli. He's kewl. The best boss ever on earth. I love my colleagues. Yan, Jeff Wong and Abu. Naresh is a steady boss. He'll stand on his saying no matter what!

    So my last Raya holidays was full of phone calls. I called every single person I wanted to call but I'm a bit frustrated for not being able to call Ein and Fiza, the one who worked in Telekom.

    I was in my Kampung. Surprisedly, the telephone reception was quite good, I mean Celcom. But I can't talk properly with people. And in Seremban, my house was in the middle of 2 base station. In my kampung, Maxis was totally out but in Seremban, it was hard to make a call, as every line was busy like hell. Why everyone was using maxis? Maxis shouls be raising it's rate so that i can use Maxis line easier. Otherwise, I'll be talking long hours with Fiza and Ekin.

    But I managed to call Fizah, who's still studyin in Shah Alam. Long hours. Real long hours.. But I can say I'm fucked. hehe..

    Last Saturday, I rushed to KL, as to go to Elizany's wedding. Yeah, that son of a Satan (kiddin) already married, and he left me with other devils like Fendi, Ayam and who EVER to go on with this boring life. Having a wife is something that is surely kewl, as for one thing, you don't have to go out to look for a companion. You can chat the whole nite, and if u feel scared you can always have someone to console you, to hug you or even kiss you, and it's nice to hear your loved one praying her love towards you.

    What else huh.. The next day I went to Subang Jaya, as usual, forcing them to open the door for me. I called all Wira, Hemsem and Farok earlier in the morning but they seems to be sleeping fucking safe and loudly sound. In the afternoon, went to lunch with Nyahche.. oh nyahche.. It's been so long since we last met.

    Then I went out, to Pusat Bandar Damansara. Met Itik's mom who was excited to introduced me to a nice petite gal, Salmi. Spent time there.. and went out again. I met Ija.. fetched her from her home and for the first time I've the chance to meet to pretty gal. We went to Ampang Point's coffee bean and spent time there till late 10s and sent her back and again rushed back to USJ. Then we went to KL for soup, went back and watched that scary movie, dawn of the dead. Damn it was darn fucking mad scary. Shit I was like scared to death imagining the whole people in the world becoming zombies.

    Monday :: Haha.. I'm not going to work. In the afternoon, I went to Usj's mosque to help him on his wedding things.


    Then to Shah Alam for his wedding thing. Then as promised I went to see Fizah, and this is why I was fucked.

    She's not supposed to bring NJ with her. I don't like NJ. I shouldn't be saying anything bad abt her rite. But then, NJ was there.. and I'm fucked but I'm just kewl. I went back home and asked Salmi to drop by. And we watched Mr. Incredibles.

    Tuesday went to work and bored. Went back home at around 8, and fetched Yana from Serdang and took her to Futsal. Played futsal with all my friends and sent yana back home.

    November 19, 2004

    How I reduced weight...

    My weight :: My normal weight (as for now) is around 67-69 kgs. The fasting month has also caused my normal activities; physical, going out, eating and so on to also been reduced, as the result of fasting itself. It took me the whole month of taking the meal once a day to reduce my weight from 69 to 62 kg, it's official just when I arrived at home for Raya holidays last Thursday. A reduction of 7 kgs.

    Wow :: I can't believe myself. At myself I was looking.. hmm.. my cheekbones are now easy to be noticed. I haven't seen my cheekbones for quite sometimes. My sister was laughing at me as I'm having a big head as compared to my small and thin frame of my body. Hmm.. what had happened to myself. I'm getting too thin, but I'm happy now. It's just like a dream come true.

    The ART :: Not even sahur, I rarely took my late supper. There was once I break fast by just drink plain water and a few picks of dates, as to to have my heavy meals later but I ended up going back home and slept. I only wake up the next day at 6 o'clock. I was so hungry for the next day. As for a tight budgeted person like me, it's really kewl to be in the Ramadhan. At the mosque I went to have free meal sometimes. Since I'm fasting, I don't really have to waste my time for unscheduled tea time. No munchies during work.

    State of the ART :: Back with state of the art style, hell no.. what the heck was GTH in the previous comment. Is it Gran Turismo Hell version? hehe.. :p Well, we were just passed the holy month of Ramadhan, a month of the Moslems; As Rajab the month of the God and Sya'aban as the month of Muhammad. You are not supposed to say that . That's the beauty of the Ramadhan. We are not only experiencing thirst and hinger, we are suppose to learn to control ourselves from doing unsupposedly things. I know, my bad, I was cursing and I'm so sorry. My point is, fasting gives me a lot of good impacts.

    Fasting effects :: If we exercise the Fasting Ibadah properly, we are supposed to detoxify ourselves from unwanted chemicals and toxic. I was achieving this by the end of the fasting ibadah. I'm very toxified, as I can conclude from the late result. By the book, we should consume a lot of water. Reduced the food taken during the fast breaking. The result of fasting for the first few days would be a drastic weight reduction without any effect on yourselves. You feel hungry as your body still contains a lot of toxificated fats. Day by day, as for myself, I'm getting easier to get cold in the air conditioned office as the fats are all gone. BY that time, your urine will get more coloured, as for my case it's nearly to red or chocolate, and the smell was yucks! I felt uneasy with myself, as I could say, I was having bad breathe for the first few weeks. And more, how much deodorant I put wouldn't stop my armpit from throwing out bad smells, even though I'm working in the air conditioned office.

    Why :: All the bad breathe, smelly urine, bad odour are the result of detoxification! I was actually get it from the reading. I was hoping that the result will come out after the 14th day of fasting as suggested in the article, but for a fully toxified person like me, it took me 24 days to be detoxificated! From that article, a full detoxification process will result your body to become normal after 14 days. I was not only detoxificated, I lost my weight by 7 kgs!!

    So then it's raya!!!

    We were having our morning breakfast!

    Yummy! But I just lost my weight!!!

    Just after the prayer, we went back home and took this picture. I was burnt in the heat!
    From the left back row :: Hafiiqh, Hafiizh, Ikhwan, My Father, Faizah and Izzat
    From the left middle row :: Wani, My mom, My Mak Lang and my nenek
    From the left front row :: Farah and My Pak Lang.

    From the left :: Ikhwan, My father, Farah, Hafizh and Hafiqh

    From the left :: Izzat, myself, Hafizh, Ikhwan and Hafiqh. I'm not that short aight?

    It's the happy moment!!!

    November 14, 2004

    I would like to take this opportunity to.....

    Please allow me....

    The last few days of fasting is really challenging my soul and mind. I'm now facing the real weather, it's hot and no longer raining in the afternoon. As for the last Thursday, things gone really bad for me as the night before, I was writing my last blog as I've to stay in the office to do a change in the production server. Breaking fast only with some dates and a bottle of water, I planned to have my dinner later.

    As I've finished with my thing, I went back home, made some calls. especially to Farok asking where he's going tonite. Then my father also called asking me when am I going back to Seremban. So I decided to go back to Seremban the same nite, maybe after I went and spend some time with Farok and Hemsem.

    Just I'm not sure when did I fell asleep, and I only woke up the next morning 6.30. It has passed the range of time to eat. Oh GOD!!.. I'm f*ckin hungry. Really hungry. I missed my promise with Farok, and I even didn't go back to Seremban as promised to my father.

    I packed up all my things and drove off to Seremban. The traffic on the highway near Bangi was a bit frightening, I'm tired of the traffic jam, so I decided to take the old route back to Seremban. It was all fun, I vtec'ed as many time as I want, it's just that my car cannot get the desired heat as the route was through the forest and the weather was cold. It's not performing really well.

    The whole day was tiring. As I arrived, I followed my parents to the market. I was like fainting as the result of no drinks and food since tuesday. Then to KL with my father, and get back home, looking for a new freezer. The 2 years old freezer seems not to be working fine anymore.

    Then as usual, before such festival celebration, we'll clean up the house, cook, bake cakes and cookies, cook rendangs, buy lemangs and so many more. The last nite of Tarawih seems nothing much for me, except that, the feeling of the month that is going to leave us was quite saddening. The last nite of doing tadarrus with the whole family seems as usual till Abang Bakri came over and we talked about a lotsa things.

    Kak Ani mentioned about my cousin who's just gonna get his second child. And she mentioned if I was married, I'll be having the second one as well, hehe.. I was just smiling.


    It's the eve of Raya, again. There's a lot of things been mingling over my tired mind. Even though fasting at home is much more makin me thirstier and hungrier, at least I can do my fasting in a better condition, holier thinking, pure mind without external distraction that will waste my fasting. Ya know leave in KL, there's nothing that u are keen not to see. Everything was like 'MESTI TONTON' (must-watch) campaign by NTV7. I'm dumb if i ain't be looking into a girl wearing short skirt. I might be a non-appreciative if my eyes weren't exploring the shape of a pretty sexy lady, and I'm a gay if don't look at girls at all!!!

    Well, it's the feeling again. Feeling of being apart of this world, apart from all other people who just got their own way of living, better life with someone they cared very much. I used tp have friends who were just there anyime we would be in need of 'em. Just name 'em, ROmdzi, Wira, Hemsem, Omen, Lego, Farok & Taiko, some of them even willing to sacrifice their holidays just to make myself happy in the ward of a hospital. I'm aware I myself wouldn't be able to do such thing in return.

    The misery of having the same feeling over and over again has been haunting me just as when I recite the Takbir of Eid. How I wish it supposed to be done in a different way, different place and different people. I haven't gain control over things. Thing has gain control over me. I was easily overwhelmed by new achievements, old sentiments and feelings.

    I went to the mosque and followed the Takbir Group from a house to another, It was not as fun as I normally do in my Village Hometown. It's really boring but guess I've to take care of my father's/mother's felling. I told them that I'm gonna be back to the village and they happened to be not so happy about it.

    Here are some pictures..

    I'm getting much much sleepy by now. Nite... da!

    * I would like to take this opportunity to wish all my readers a very Selamat Hari Raya...

    November 10, 2004

    Jejak Kasih + Raya Mood...

    Actually, a few last weeks till the last weekend, it was sort of a rekeep-in-touch season for me. Some of my long lost friend, either lost contact or whatever lost you can name it, are now back in touch with me..

    Case 1 :: Ieda. After nearly a year we've not been in touch, out of nowhere she sms'ed me telling me that she's now a single lady, after fights over fights with her boy, which I was always there to help. The last time I helped her was by making her boy jealous, which is seems not to be working very well. We lost contact after that. And she wanted to go out with me. I'm fine.. hehe..

    Case 2 :: Raimie Maljono. My senior in school. He's the prefect who took care of the whole dorm when I was in Form 1. He's married now. He's happy with his life now. I wonder why I was so happy seeing hime too, because he was well-known as the curseman. He will just curse anything that popped out of his mind. I've got his influent badly, hehe.. all my friend knoe.

    Case 3 :: Harliyan. Heheh.. last nite I went out with her. We used to work together for the project of Halal.Com.My. She was in the different company, Quantum Parallel Sdn. Bhd. She's nice. Very nice person and she is kinduf short and I always make fun of her. But she's kewl. I always admire her kewlness. We lost contact since I left AMSTEK.

    Case 4 :: Wawa. She's from Seremban. I've not been in touch with her for I guess, maybe nearly 2 years. She's a nice friend. I lost contact with her after I went out with another girl Siti Nirwana, hehe..

    Case 5 :: Sheyna. Not for so long. I actually lost her number when I accidentally found her @ Kelab Darul Ehsan, but I was pretending to ensure her number is correct. Unfortunately, her number is still in my phone. Just in a different name. Well, I was so happy to see her, we were taking for quite sometimes but.. I know u're busy sheyna.. We'll go out sometimes k? Was so happy to see her again. Do we lost contact.. err..

    Case 6 :: Daymen, Hez, and other HCOC club members. HCOC stands for Honda Cars Owner Club. I last met them in 2002, during the track day. I missed them so much. After losing my Honda, I was hardly seeing them, ashamed of not being a honda owner, they actually encouraged me to come to the gaths, and join in the fun. Yeah I really miss these guys. They're super kool!

    Case 7 :: The most unexpected. I met with Khalila Khalid. She was my gf back in school, when I was in form 3. I can't deny that I was so happy to actually met and keep in touch with her. It was when I went for window shopping with Farok and Hemsem on the last Sunday. She manage to look just like when she was in school. Reason for lost contact; broke up.

    Case 8 :: The most special is, I get to keep in touch with Fiza. As someone who was and still so special to me, of course I'm very happy. Instead of all the sadness, I treasure every moment between us, as I'm so happy to at talk to you over the phone or Yahoo Messenger. It's good to know that you're doing fine with your life, despite your hardship, always think that there are, people who are having much much harder life than we do. I know you're reading this. . So take care.


    Meetup Wish List....

    I wish to see and go out and chill with these people :-

    1. Fiza.. okay hold up. It's Fiza err.. I don't know her full name. She works in the Telekom and she had just recently commented my blog.. Chill Chill!! :p ; she asked for duit raya too..

    2. Julie.. I've never met this guy. We talk only through phone or sms. She knows me well and I just don;t know why. Well, I appreciate her. so so much.

    3. Eric. he's so bz with things.

    4. Fizah.. again another fiza in my life. She's a pretty girl studying in Shah Alam.

    5. Ailin. I missed her so much. I don't know why u're keeping a distance off me. I know I always make fun of you. My BAD. so sorry..

    6. Ieda. Yeah.. I wanted to go out with you too..

    7. Anis.. she's a married sister who always nagged about me not to choose a lady to be my girl friend. She's busy now. Been in overseas for about a year plus.

    8. Rika.. she was about to be eric's gf.. but I know eric.. she's getting a new bf now and I want to see her and say hi and talk about her super duper new bf.

    9. Kimi.. a friend of mine, my bassist guitar player. He's in a hardship of life now. I'm going to tell him that I care and love this guy very very much...

    10. Of course Khalila. How I wish. I was delivering this idea to see her, but she was thinking that I'm gonna open the old book. y'all, my bad.. it's not that. I'm just wanted to chill out, and relax. yeah.. nearly 12 years we've not been seeing each other, there's a lot to tell.

    11. Chot.. My ex school mate. She's now the news reader on TV. You can recognize her by the name Rosmanizam Md. Dali. I wanted to be a journalist and maybe I should talk to her.

    12. Baby Rosie.. She's coming back!!!!!!!!!! In december!!! Come on baby.. I'm waiting for you!!!

    13. Sheyna.. I'm badly wanting you.. opps.. wanting to go out with you.. have a lotsa things to talk.


    Yeah.. I'm done now but yet done at all. I've a lot more things to jot in here.

    First of all. I'm motivationally very low. I'm not happy with my job now. I don't know whether I should maintain my sweetness, good realtionship with everyone in my workplace. People seems to be annoying me in so many ways. They stepped on my head when I'm down to earth. Just everyone.

    I used to be not so kewl person. Hot blooded. Stupid. Low self esteem. Bad, not naughty but a real bad ass.

    The things that happened to me lately has triggered me into some state that caused my inner berserk desire to explode. Now with no one by my side, I'm all alone in facing everything in my life.

    Lucky for me to have Farok & Hemsem, a listener for me to tell 'em all my raged feelings towards anything happened in my working life which I had my pride with. And my friend Wira to ask where do I go when something gone wrong with my car. For me, something wrong with the car means, all my body and head are aching too!

    But to which extent they would go to help me out.

    I don't know..

    Now I'm alone in the office. Everyone else had gone for their holiday. I'm stuck here cause I've things to do. And I miss talking to my blog. So i'm writing as much as possible that I could. I just think I'm getting carried away with my writings now. Not focus. Diverging. No points.

    That's how my mind is now. I'm not focus to my life. My mind is boggling about something else when it's supposed to be doing something else.

    It's not easy to be me.

    - I'm just someone who don't know how to say 'NO'
    - I'm someone who is to please everyone.
    - I'm someone who is to please myself too.
    - I'm someone in the middle of so many people who are so coward to tell what they want or what they think so they keep telling me to tell the other people for them
    - You can ask me to do anything for you

    That's how my work life.

    I'm goin to dump this job....~ Soon ~

    November 9, 2004

    A fess :: We're in a situation and I'm f*ckin messed!!

    Y'all, my bad. I'm not gonna curse for nothin'.

    Just blogged, I was alarmed by this Corona problem, but i just take it easy as I do think I am able to handle it properly, as i've been gettin' enough inputs from all the relevant parties. I stopped the operation, backup the database and run a weekly job.

    Tomorrow mornin'. BOMB! The system is bombed and the problem was raised as level 1 severity alarm instead of Level 2, means if we failed to deliver within time, I'll die!


    The thing is, everyone get panicked so easy and everyone is getting emotional. I JUST DON'T KNOW WHY?

    The rule of nature :: We shall never get angry or emotional when we are facing problem. Gettin' angry/emotional will not lead y'all to a rationalized thinking. So chill out, and you can think properly.

    I've to be in the conference meeting call every half an hour. Just to listen to those stupid people speaking arrogantly. I'm the one whose facing the customer here. I'm freakin' mad to hell as they keep askin' things while we're doing our job, not only askin', i was so mad as they said i'm slow. F*CK!

    Guys, what would u just think if we're just doin your job, we investigate the causes, we do any appropriate things as to get things back to normal, and while the meantime, they keep mumblin & naggin & bla bla bla at you, askin this and that, and sayin that u're slow. I was freakin' f*ckin' mad.

    The users are just fine with the problem as they crossed their fingers by sayin that they just depend on us on what to be done. They asked us to do anything, and they're able to sacrifice anything as to get the system back to normal. The users are just so nice but not the people inside the company.


    On that thursday nite, I'm so thankful for the chance to get going to Kelab Darul Ehsan (KDE) for berbuka puasa. The database restore went too long and i decided with my boss to go to the Berbuka Puasa at KDE; and guess what, I've met sheyna there.. Hi Sheyna..


    Restored the database, as it took me nearly 2 days. Startin' from 1.30 pm Thursday and end up at almost 7 pm the next day. I brought the system up and runnin' and users are just fine but now it's now time to hunt for a scapegoat. Lucky I'm not the one to be hunted, as I'm just doing my job.

    I'm just freakin frustrated as the meetings are not to find a solution, but to find someone to blame, so that they can leave it and they don't have to do any job as there's someone to blame and leave it back to the the one who is in guilt.

    So that freakin Friday nite, I went back, late at 12 o'clock and get my first good sleep after 3 days of messy days. -sigh-


    So on that fine Saturday, went again to the office, get things done, get all the reports completed, and went back home. Managed to berbuka puasa @ bangsar. Then at nite, went off to USJ, and slept there.

    This is funny, there was once all the lights went off as the fan owned by hemsem was faulty, and the result is - THEIR STREAMYX CONNECTION WENT OFF. Why? I just find it funny as, the bill has not been paid for 6-7 months, and they had never get it disconnected for that 6-7 months just to keep the connection. As the electricity back to normal, they are not able to connect to streamyx again.

    Sundae :: Okay. Movie day. I woke up just to find myself is actually sleeping in USJ. I thought i'm still @ home in Taman Desa so that's why i felt so cold without the blankets. I watched, Stephen Chow's movie, Cooler, and what else, haha.. southpark uncut!

    Then me, Farok and Hemsem went to Jalan TAR as Hemsem got things to be bought. I was talking a lotsa thing to Farok, especially about work, as he's working in the bank industry as well, just the difference are he's in the bank while I'm not in the bank.

    Then went to One Utama. Kenny Rogers. Gosh I've not been to Kenny Rogers for quite some time. It's the pervert mailing list that I accidentally joined gathering actually. But instead of all the porn messages, some of them are quite nice. Well, all I can say, they're all look very very much decent as compared to me, farok and hemsem. Hei, I don't send pervert porn mails. I just read 'em. hahaha. Sometimes when i'm in a situation, need seomthing cooling for my eyes

    At nite, we again watched TV, but now is the TV drama. Then went out for Late supper @ carlos, and I met my HCOC friends over there. I'll shoot some pictures one day. Then again watched movie and slept.

    Monday, I decided to rest. I sent my car to workshop to replace my sensor. I wanted to change my back arm mounting boosch too. Then my disc brake too. They cost me near RM500. errr.. I felt so bad as I'm actually reaching the level of badly broke now. But still okay, I can manage it. so @ nite, i again spent my money buying some cheap clothes and 2 DVDs. White chicks and ENVY.

    Well, those are good movies. I need not to say anything. If u want you should buy urself. Or else, I can let u borrow it if u want.


    Today i'm back in the office and I'm again stranded in between people who makes decision but they're just can't talk to each other. And today I'm f*cked again.

    It's so messy in the office. I just don;t know why. I'm being f*cked from every angle of my sight. Ouch! This is a freakin mess.

    Now, I feel worse. I just can't live with all these thing again. There's a lot. I just can't put it down in here..


    I'm lost in my very own pride of working world...

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