May 6, 2004

Tasha :: Should I or should I not?

Dis day iz thirtsdae.. (Dialogues in bold)

Arrived early :: As I parked my car, in a nice parking space, under the chilling trees, I've got a call from someone and it was Tasha..

Tasha :: Hello, where are u?
Me :: I just parked my car, near the office.
Tasha :: Can you go out for a while?
Me :: Where to?
Tasha :: Can u take me to the clinic. I'm sick.

My state of mind :: At this point, I was so blurred and sad, since all this while she will only look for me if she needs something, she wants something or she wants me to do something for her. So I decided...

Me :: I'm afraid I just can't. I've promised to see my boss this morning.

Why :: I have to. I'm sick and tired for just being used. Should I get myself in a such feeling? She has never contacted me unless she wants me to drive her to a place she wanted to go. Or take her home.. Or take her to the post office to get things her so called best male-friend posted from Japan. Or teach her things she cannot understand from her stupid stewarding notes. Again today, she contacted me to take her to the clinic.

I'm nothing to her :: All this while she went out, get drunk, get what ever things, have fun with her friends. But why not me? We even met in the HRC but later she left me alone with her childish stewarding student friends. I was like a stoopid moron there.

Tasha :: Hmm.. it's okay then.. (sound of hanging up).

But :: Well, I feel bad. I might be losing her as a friend, even she's just nothing to me. I didn't ask her how bad her sickness was. Well she never asked too when I was having a bad fever, she asked me out, and I was hoping that she can come over to me if I tell her I'm badly sick but what she did was, "Ok then.. Bubbye".

Am I being fair :: No.. It was not my intention. I'm just being sick of her, seeking me just for something. Just for help.. I might wanna change my number either this week and next. I feel really bad especially after having a chat with sheyna, telling me that if she is badly sick, it's a must to help her out. But I did nothing then!!!

Your say :: Should I do things I've been doing today? I need your say please!!! Please!!! Should I just forget her? Or what ever thing I should do? Help!!

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